Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Mardigian Library to remove all books; students won't notice

Is it April already? Well, this is the first April Fool's joke of the season that I've spotted and it's a nicely done bit of satire by the student newspaper at the University of Michigan-Dearborn.
Students visiting UM-D's newly-renovated Mardigian Library will find plenty of room to study and hang out, now that the books are gone.

Library administrators undertook the renovations in response to a Student Government petition, removing all books and shelving and installing a state-of-the-art sound system and night club-style lighting. According to the SG petition, the books and shelves were "taking up a lot of unnecessary space that might be better utilized by students who want to see their tuition used to serve their needs."
Students visiting the library seemed happy with the changes. Senior education major Helga Dummkopf said, "I guess I never noticed they had books here before because I only came here to buy cappuccino sometimes. But seriously, this is so much cooler, now I really want to come to the library."

Mudack Padlo, a junior majoring in comparative literature, echoed Dummkopf's sentiments. "I was never actually inside the library before because I was kind of intimidated by all the books, but it's really more student-friendly now, so I'll be coming here a lot from now on."

Larry Wormer and Calvin Thorpe duel over one of the few books that were overlooked in the library restructuring. The overachievers made other students look stupid as they clung to the hardcopy.


  1. Oh, I am sooo using this for my own little library crusade (http://savethellbc.wordpress.com). Thanks!

  2. The sad thing about satire is it always hits a bit close to home.

    That's a great piece, though - very funny.

  3. Glad that you enjoyed it, Sylvia...it really is almost too scary to think about, isn't it?

  4. Anne, it's a scary bit for sure because of how libraries seem to be changing so drastically these days...and not always for the better.

    But the quotes, in particular, gave me a good laugh. :)

  5. Yes, the sad thing is that this is not too far off the mark anymore. As long as there are computers, there, right??! I work in a library and some of the things I read and the decisions that are made these days sort of make me sad. I hate not to progress with the times, and technology can be great, but man,leave the books alone!

  6. Danielle, when books become secondary in a library, it's no longer a library. I hope that those in charge remember that simple truth.

  7. "Senior education major Helga Dummkopf said, "I guess I never noticed they had books here before because I only came here to buy cappuccino''

    Bizarre statement from someone majoring in "education"

  8. *sigh*....I must be slow; I only just worked out this is a hoax. But it certainly had a ring of truth to it :)

  9. Don't feel bad, Nick. This bit of satire is slow close to reality that it's scary. What's happening to library systems around the world has more than a few of us concerned that books will soon be taking a back seat to the more "exotic" formats offered up by today's technology.