tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post6032230861547713274..comments2024-03-28T01:35:06.113-05:00Comments on Book Chase: I'll Be Seeing You: A Memoir - Elizabeth BergSam http://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-5288182579609235162021-01-15T13:13:38.757-06:002021-01-15T13:13:38.757-06:00Definitely healing, Jen, in the sense that it make...Definitely healing, Jen, in the sense that it makes all you went through sound like the universal experience it really is. I never expected to go through this with three of the four parents (my mother died very suddenly at 75) we had between us, but reading this explained that what was happening to all of us was today's norm. The anger and resentment - on both sides- that sometimes happens Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-12866312194084706642021-01-15T13:09:21.856-06:002021-01-15T13:09:21.856-06:00Cathy, I think it's easy for people to make th...Cathy, I think it's easy for people to make that kind of response to what you were going through if they haven't gone through it themselves...or read something like this book that tells it like it is. Guilt is part of the experience for all caretakers and it's a natural response. The people who said what they did to you are either saints, hypocrites, or they don't know a thing Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-79006145845266172182021-01-15T13:06:30.340-06:002021-01-15T13:06:30.340-06:00Lark, if you don't read this one, do try to fi...Lark, if you don't read this one, do try to find something similar. It will help...I guarantee it.Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-37111568417880185252021-01-15T13:05:40.634-06:002021-01-15T13:05:40.634-06:00I wish I had read more about the experience before...I wish I had read more about the experience before we went through it here, Jeane. Books like this one are good to prepare people for what is inevitable for so many of us.Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-54984845415039355692021-01-15T10:19:25.021-06:002021-01-15T10:19:25.021-06:00Been there and had my heart broken over and over. ...Been there and had my heart broken over and over. Watching parents who were so strong, so resilient, and so loving die slowly is hard. It was, perhaps, harder with my father who had AD. I don't know if I'm up to this book yet, but it does sound healing in spite of being sad.jenclairhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06046532245054911248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-89546297823021198202021-01-14T18:57:52.776-06:002021-01-14T18:57:52.776-06:00I am so sorry about those people. Very sad that th...I am so sorry about those people. Very sad that they responded that way. Quite unbelievable really. Though it is easy for people to see things from the outside without really living inside a life.Nanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15547916206007733970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-37192794380532130932021-01-14T15:57:19.679-06:002021-01-14T15:57:19.679-06:00Reading a personal perspective often makes things ...Reading a personal perspective often makes things feel more real and relatable to me. I think I will add this one to my list, thanks Sam.Jeanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02270303640902731044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-41985665118461277142021-01-14T15:30:37.676-06:002021-01-14T15:30:37.676-06:00Thank you for bringing this book to my attention, ...Thank you for bringing this book to my attention, Sam. My father died at the age of nineteen when I was fourteen months old. Growing up, it was just me, my mother, and my maternal grandparents. When my mother died in 1995, it was just me and my grandfather, and we lived two thousand miles apart. He came out to live with me for a few years. I twice mentioned something that bothered me about Life Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01774383554326288663noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-39558447466691389532021-01-14T15:06:42.668-06:002021-01-14T15:06:42.668-06:00It's been hard watching my mom age and lose gr...It's been hard watching my mom age and lose ground a little bit more every year. Luckily, she's still all there mentally. But I know I don't have many more years with her, so I'm trying to enjoy each and every moment, you know? Lark https://www.blogger.com/profile/13777891312147377769noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-72094447358345206442021-01-14T13:05:31.231-06:002021-01-14T13:05:31.231-06:00Nan, good luck. It is a difficult situation that c...Nan, good luck. It is a difficult situation that can wear you down before you realize it. It was definitely life-changing for my wife and me to go through it with our parents. I don't dread the phone ringing anymore...although I still have flashbacks when I'm not thinking (not kidding).Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-66707440926330783862021-01-14T13:03:33.014-06:002021-01-14T13:03:33.014-06:00Susan, I found it accurate and realistic. We went ...Susan, I found it accurate and realistic. We went through some of the things described in the book as my wife and me dealt with three parents at the ends of their lives. It's an eye-opener for those who haven't been there yet, and I think it could make the experience, terrible as it is, at least a little easier.Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-43929755868383408152021-01-14T13:00:45.873-06:002021-01-14T13:00:45.873-06:00Cath, this book is very good, I think, for those o...Cath, this book is very good, I think, for those of us who see this as a coming problem for our own children. Berg is pretty good at helping us see the same situation through the eyes of her parents as they went through this gut-wrenching experience. I do suppose though that dementia and the like make it impossible to read something like this and think you'll use the knowledge on yourself Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-77902561376639138972021-01-14T12:58:00.690-06:002021-01-14T12:58:00.690-06:00Gawande's book is much more about improving th...Gawande's book is much more about improving the way we handle end-of-life issues than this one. This memoir is one family's very personal experience with that problem. Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-66810255488142128532021-01-14T12:56:58.839-06:002021-01-14T12:56:58.839-06:00Diane, this is definitely not something you read f...Diane, this is definitely not something you read for pleasure. It's sobering and even a little scary, but if you are ever in that situation, I do recommend it.Sam https://www.blogger.com/profile/17448913705757509608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-69942851970084861972021-01-14T11:38:00.020-06:002021-01-14T11:38:00.020-06:00For me, this wasn't the case. My father died w...For me, this wasn't the case. My father died when I was 20 and my mother when I was 25. No siblings. Now, in Tom's family I am seeing the side of being a child when parents are really old. His stepfather just died, a day before their 17th anniversary. Now she has to move into a smaller assisted living apartment. But before he died, there have been almost four years of watching Nanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15547916206007733970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-87924861852096909802021-01-14T08:36:19.689-06:002021-01-14T08:36:19.689-06:00My dad is 82 and my mom is 78. They're both in...My dad is 82 and my mom is 78. They're both in relatively good health, but they're definitely getting frailer and more helpless. It won't be long before my siblings and I will be in the situation you describe and some tough decisions will have to be made. Sounds like this book has some good insight. I'll have to check it out.Susanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05344704891037668456noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-74582299051575106412021-01-14T04:30:46.866-06:002021-01-14T04:30:46.866-06:00What a heartfelt review, Sam. We both lived away f...What a heartfelt review, Sam. We both lived away from our parents, my husband and I, because he was a bank manager and years ago they used to move them around a *lot*. So we've not had the experience of looking after elderly parents and won't now because all parents have now passed away. We're going to experience it from the other point of view, that of the ones needing care. It Cathhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06371069000185280668noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-27376016087836019562021-01-13T21:32:57.953-06:002021-01-13T21:32:57.953-06:00Reading your review of this made me think back to ...Reading your review of this made me think back to Being Mortal by Gawande, but I don't know how comparable they are. Maybe I will look at this one someday.Jeanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02270303640902731044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38656633.post-31356681689294889332021-01-13T17:09:20.814-06:002021-01-13T17:09:20.814-06:00I've read most of what Eliz Berg has written b...I've read most of what Eliz Berg has written but for some reason the memoir didn't tempt me.(Diane) Bibliophile By the Seahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10519875632878992728noreply@blogger.com